Kickstart with Stoicism for yourself and develop a stronger mindset

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9 Principles of Stoicism which will Improve your Life | by Stephen Baines |  Medium

During the years that I took my philosophy classes through internet, I first came into contact with the Stoics for the first time. The image I got of them then was of dusty philosophers who had taken all the emotions out of their lives. Simply put: I thought it was robots. 

Years later I came across them again, but not in a philosophical context. I heard top entrepreneurs from America talking about how stoicism had changed their lives. 

“Are they talking about that same boring philosophy I had my classes on?” I wondered. 

It turned out to be the same philosophy. Because inspiring world leaders were so enthusiastic about Stoicism, I started to delve into it after all. Unexpectedly opened a new world.

We are now a few years further and I see it as the best and most practical philosophy for a good life. (My personal opinion in which you don’t have to agree).

How come I—and you probably have too—had such a different view of Stoicism? 

The misconception people have about Stoicism comes from the meaning of the word in our language. We use it as a description for someone who appears indifferent. We don’t mean that someone is actually a Stoic.

It is not surprising that the word has acquired this meaning. Stoics can indeed seem indifferent. Only if you delve a little more into this philosophy, you will discover that nothing about the image is right. 

Indifferent as Stoics may seem, they are precisely people who place enormous value on life. They just make life so important that they don’t want to be guided by their emotions. They have just as many emotions as anyone else, but have learned how to deal with them effectively. 

I am now of the opinion that everyone should delve into Stoicism. It would make every life and the world a lot more beautiful. But before I dive into the top three reasons why you should start with stoicism. First very briefly what stoicism actually is. 

Stoic Wisdom for Business Resilience and Success - ToughNickel

What is Stoicism? 

Stoicism is a way of life that offers the wisdom and strength to deal with the challenges of life. 

Stoicism originated in the heyday of Greek antiquity, in which several philosophical movements and schools arose. Stoicism was one of those schools, but it had two main differences from the others:

  1. Stoicism was specifically about the good life and what it should look like. 
  2. Stoicism focuses on practice and not on thinking. Stoicism is also called a practical philosophy.  

This unique approach made Stoicism popular among all layers of society. The most famous Stoics we know today from ancient times come mainly from Roman times. The reason for this is that the texts from that time have been preserved.

The most famous texts are from the diaries of Marcus Aurelius: “Meditations”. His work is popular to this day. Aurelius was one of the best emperors the Roman Empire has known and was an outspoken Stoic. He owes his enormous success largely to this philosophy. 

The most important lesson from Stoicism is that we must distinguish between two things in life: (1) the parts of life that we can influence and (2) that we cannot influence. 

Furthermore, the Stoics used many exercises to achieve a powerful mindset. For example, consciously thinking about fears in order to overcome them. 

That is stoicism in a nutshell. But why should you learn more about this philosophy? I have three main reasons for this.    

1. Stoicism is the practical philosophy for the good life that has proven itself for thousands of years

In all the years at school and study I have learned a lot to be able to function successfully in society. An example of some lessons that I unfortunately missed:

  • How to deal with setbacks
  • How to deal with emotions
  • How to maintain self-control
  • How to make the most of your days

In summary: I was groomed to be a good citizen, but I was not taught anything about how to shape a good life. I think that’s the biggest flaw in our school system of the past century.

If you don’t get it at school, you have roughly two other options where you can search for ‘the good life’:

  1. Studying Philosophers and Their Works 
  2. Dive into the ‘self-help world’ 

Unfortunately, both options have major limitations, so you will not find the answer to a good life quickly. Life is a journey to discover and explore more and more.

If you have ever read the work of a philosopher, you will notice that it takes a study to understand it. The philosophical works deal with the important themes of life, but they offer no practical handles. It’s nice that a philosopher might have the answer, but if he can’t simply convey it, then this is of no use to you.  

The self-help world, on the other hand, does offer concrete handles. Only you run into another problem there: what to believe about all those magical stories? You come across gurus who believe in golden mountains, but for which there is no evidence to support it. 

Is there anything for ‘the good life’ that does not have these problems?

Yes, that’s where stoicism comes in. A philosophy that is completely devoted to the good life, is practically applicable and has proven itself for thousands of years (and nowadays even substantiated by science). A unique combination that you do not see in other philosophies or contemporary self-help. 

For example, with contemporary self-help you can quickly ask yourself: does this person mainly want to earn money or actually help me further? And despite the good intentions of a ‘guru’, of course, this person also has to earn a living. 

Stoicism does not suffer from this. The works of the Stoics are never intended for a hip course or for publication at all.

Take, for example, the work of Marcus Aurelius. He wrote all his texts to himself like a diary. It was never the idea that it would be read by you today. He certainly didn’t have to make any money with it. His sole purpose was to give advice to himself. 

What makes Stoicism all the more suitable is that it has enormous similarities with the contemporary science of psychology. The exercises prescribed by the Stoics are reflected in what positive psychology prescribes. There is even direct research now showing that stoicism actually makes a big impact on your life.  

Reason 2: Stoicism brings you an extremely powerful mindset

Imagine. You are the emperor of the whole world. You can literally do anything you want. Everything is arranged for you, every wish can come true. You can pursue any pleasure you want. The world is at your feet.

How long would you last to consistently make the right ones? How long can you put your human needs aside for the ‘great good’?

History shows that hardly anyone can last long. The books are full of examples of world leaders who sooner or later went wrong. The well-known saying is that success sooner or later goes to your head.

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Yet there is an emperor of the past who did exactly that which seems impossible. Not for a short period, no, for 19 years. I mentioned his name before: Marcus Aurelius, one of the best and most respected emperors the Roman Empire has known.

Aurelius was trained from an early age to become emperor. He was literally primed to do the right thing and there was constant work on getting the right mindset. The philosophy he embraced before that was Stoicism. 

The list of successful Stoics is now a lot longer. They all owe their success to their mindset, which they have acquired through the practice of Stoicism.

So when you start practicing Stoicism, you work towards an extremely powerful mindset. It ensures discipline and self-control. It prepares you for setbacks and helps you deal with them.

And if things go well for you and follow success after success, it helps you to remain humble and keep your feet on the ground.

Reason 3: Stoicism offers an alternative path to happiness in our consumer society

We live in a society in which the focus is on consumption. Success is measured by many in wealth and equipment. 

I probably don’t have to explain to you that consuming does not make you permanently happy. Yes, you are overjoyed after buying your first car, but after a short time you are already in your head in your next car. Luck always seems to be in front of you. 

Even though we know that things don’t make us happy, we still subconsciously believe in them. And if you lose that faith, there are plenty of ads that will convince you to give it another try.  

Our entire society is focused on consumption, which is what makes our economy grow. Do we stop consuming? Then the economy will stop, which of course we won’t let happen.  

Because our entire society is built on consumption, it is very difficult not to believe in it. You have to be very strong in your shoes if you don’t want to be caught by it. 

Today there is a whole movement that opposes this: minimalism. It preaches that you must give up all your belongings. Everything that stands in the way of your happiness is what you buy. 

“We have the solution!” say the minimalists. “Throw everything out the window!”

Or for the true admirers of minimalism: “throwing everything out the window? No, as a minimalist you don’t need a house and therefore you don’t need a window to throw out your stuff. If you want to be happy you have to live in nature!”

While minimalism offers a nice counterbalance to consuming, I think it brings new problems. 

Minimalists are still working on ‘more’. They like to get more from less stuff. The less stuff the better. The focus is thus still on stuff (even if it is less) and maximizing the outcome (even if it is aimed at less and less).   

Stoicism offers the solution for the shortcomings of minimalism. They look very similar from the outside. A Stoic and a minimalist both care little about stuff. Only where a minimalist focuses on stuff, a Stoic will not even be concerned with it. Having few things is a logical consequence for a Stoic and not a conscious choice. 

A Stoic is only concerned with things that he influences. Stuff is not included. Thus spoke the famous Stoic Epictetus: 

“Never say you lost something, but that you gave it back.” 

What Epictetus meant by that is that we have no influence on physical things outside of ourselves. It therefore makes no sense to see us as the owner of something, but as someone who borrows it. That way, we’re always thankful that we have it now, because we don’t take it for granted. If we eventually lose it, it’s easier to let go.  

By practicing stoicism you learn to deal with all the things around you much better. You learn to be grateful for what you have, because it is not self-evident that you have it. 

Are you losing something? No problem, you’ll be grateful you were allowed to borrow it until then. It was never your property.  

It does not matter to a Stoic how many things he has. A Stoic thinks it is much more important how he looks at the stuff. Only in this way can you become truly happy and live a good life. 

I think stoicism is the path to happiness in our consumer society. Don’t resist it like a minimalist. 

“You can’t take away the consumer society, so why worry so much about it?”, a Stoic would say. 

Stoicism teaches you to deal with your own impulses and needs, so that you do not just make purchases. And it teaches you not to get attached to your stuff. This way you can function perfectly in the consumer society. 

And now? How do I start with that stoicism?

Good question! That is exactly what Stoicism is all about: action!

My advice is to at least read a book on Stoicism. There are a number of writers who have summed up Stoicism very nicely. My top three:

  1. The obstacle is the way Ryan Holiday
  2. A Guide to the Good Life by William b. Irvine
  3. The Little Book of Stoicism by Jonas Salzgeber

Read one of these three and you can get started right away. The power of Stoicism lies not so much in gaining more knowledge about it, but mainly in continuing to repeat the knowledge and exercises. 

You don’t have to learn it, you have to learn to live it. 

Like sports, stoicism is not something you do intensively for a few times and then never again. It’s something you work on on a regular basis. For example, every morning I read a piece based on stoicism in my morning routine. In this way I get a little better every day and I continue to adjust myself where necessary. You can surely give it a try.

A nice habit that you can immediately add to your daily life. Read a short piece every morning and apply stoicism in your life. Good luck!

Also read this : What is Stoicism

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Great benefits of increased self-awareness

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When you are self-aware, you live your life according to your own values. You make your own choices and feel what is right for you. The Blogging Optimist Danny Jibodh, presents four benefits of increased self-awareness.

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Self-care

Without self-awareness, you easily neglect yourself and take less care of yourself. Increased self-awareness has a positive impact on your mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health. You become less emotional, you are more steadfast in life and you can look at yourself with a mild look.

Improving relationships

When we don’t know what we want or need, it’s hard to form a good relationship with someone. When you get to know yourself well, the way you stand in relationships changes. You learn to set limits and you know when someone is not good for you. You gather people around you who share the same values ​​and have a positive influence on you. At the same time, it makes you aware of your own responsibility within relationships.

Work smarter, more productive and mindful

When you are self-aware, you make better career choices and reduce work stress. You know what your strengths are, but you also know what you don’t excel at. This allows you to work smarter and you know better what you need to do to achieve your goal. Your productivity also increases. When you have trouble getting to work, it’s usually because thoughts, emotions, or habits are getting in the way. Increased self-awareness removes these obstacles.

Keeping calm in a crisis

Everyone has to deal with setbacks or stressful situations from time to time. Poor decision-making often stems from confused thinking and emotional reactions. Before you jump into action mode and do things you’ll regret later, take a step back.

There are countless ways to increase your self-awareness. This can be done, for example, through meditation, coaching or keeping a diary. The most important thing is to look critically at yourself. How do you feel? How do you react to something? And what is the impact of your actions?

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Five exercises for a good night’s sleep after a busy day

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We all know that a good night’s sleep is important. A good bed, a dark bedroom and little noise contribute to a good night’s sleep. Here are my favorite five exercises which gives me nice moments to relax. Try them for yourself so that you go to bed with a calm head.

1. Breathing exercise

Healthy breathing is of vital importance. If you are just thinking about something stressful, your breathing and your heartbeat will rise. By breathing in and out very consciously through your nose you can delay your breathing. Your breathing can also help you to get out of your head and to have more attention for your body. An exercise that helps to breathe deeply and calmly is the following:

  1. Find a place where you can sit or lie down.
  2. Close your eyes and breathe in and out through your nose.
  3. Breathe in four counts, hold your breath for two counts, exhale for six counts.
  4. If step three goes well, you can try to breathe in four beats, hold two beats, and exhale eight beats. Repeat this a number of rounds.
  5. Return your natural breathing and feel for a moment.

2. Yoga posture: the broken candle

The broken candle is a yoga posture, known for its stress-reducing and relaxing nature.

  1. Find a spot near a wall, lie in front of the wall, raise your legs against the wall. You can put a folded blanket under your sit bones.
  2. Put one hand on your heart and one on the belly.
  3. Breathe calmly and see if you can feel your heart beating and your belly moving through your breathing.
  4. Stay in this position for about 5 minutes.
  5. Move your legs back down and roll up through your right side.

3. Relaxation exercise: meditation

Before going to sleep it can be nice to do a relaxation exercise, such as meditation. A guided relaxation exercise is great if you don’t have much experience with it. Make sure that you are ready to go to sleep so that you can remain lying down after the exercise. You can listen to an example of a relaxation exercise here.

4. Sleeping mantra

Are you lying in bed and you notice that you are very busy in your head? Then this exercise might help you.

  1. Be aware of the unrest in your head, because then you can do something about it.
  2. Choose three words that will make you feel good, that will make you happy.
  3. Make those words your own sleeping mantra. The word mantra comes from Sanskrit and literally means: man = mind and tra = control. It is about repeating a word or sentence that gives you a positive feeling.
  4. Repeat the words quietly one after the other so that your attention remains focused on it rather than on the troubled thoughts in your head.

5. Mindset

If you have done the above exercises and you are still experiencing sleep problems, try accepting that it is not working right now. See if you can enjoy lying a bit. To be able to sleep we go from the do position to the being position.

Sleep tight!

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